Pirandello, Where Are You Now When We Need You

   The world today is like a play from the Theatre of the Absurd. We are millions of actors in search of a Playwright. We have neither script nor playbill. The author is not available to explain or answer questions. All we have is a CliffsNotes collection of inferences.

    Borrowing from Kurt Vonnegut's, Books of Bokonon , "Beware of the man who works hard to learn the right way, learns it, and finds himself no further ahead than before. He is full of murderous resentment of people who ignore the right way and are at the head of the pack without even trying to do it right."
       
    There was a time when young men were told that being courteous, polite and respectful was the way to achieve harmonious interactions with young women and that 4-letter-word vulgarity and grossness particularly in the presence of women was totally verboten. Yet today it seems the vulgarity formerly to be avoided is now issuing forth from the mouths of those very same women. Is this equality gone too far? Are the gals trying to be one of the guys?

    I’m no prude and as a former sailor and a truck driver, I doubt there are any verbal constructions or collections of formerly vulgar words that I haven’t heard. I don’t cringe. I’m beginning to expect it. Yet what I find baffling is that not only are the encouraged behaviors absent, but the completely opposite behavior is being adopted and is achieving what the good behavior was supposed to. The observation that ‘Nice guys finish last’ seems increasingly truer every day.

    I recently overheard a young man recounting an experience he had with an attractive woman who he asked, point blank, "Do you like bad boys?" Whether he got anywhere with that opening was not revealed but to hear that the 'bad boy' description he labeled himself with was expected to gain him more ground than previously acceptable behavior was enlightening in a sort of negative way.

    I'm often told that "I'm too nice" and "I'm too old". Maybe I should paraphrase Charles Schulz' Peanuts character, Snoopy, and say, "Yesterday I was an old man. Today I'm an old man. Tomorrow I'll probably still be an old man. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement."

    I can't do a damned thing about being older. Being nice? Maybe I should look for a night course on how to become a 'Bad Boy'. Even-79 year old Charles Manson has had a girlfriend for more than 5 years. She's 54 years younger than him. Although I seriously question her mental stability and definitely could not consider someone so young for a date, I have a hard time understanding why an older nice guy like me can't escape the friend zone. Manson's a monster. I'm not.

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Dr. Mardy and Charlie Brown

    Although I have long been a fan of Charlie Brown and all the other characters in the Peanuts comic strip it is only through the latest newsletter from Dr. Mardy Grothe that I am reminded of Peanuts creator Charles M. Schulz’s passing 13 years ago come February 12.

    Charles Schulz’s interest in Ethics and Theology was evident through the words spoken by his characters and he has given us many memorable quotes some of which became popular on greeting cards. If a card sending occasion arose, I’d look first through the Charlie Brown selections before making my choice often finding that Charlie or Peanuts or Linus or Lucy had spoken words appropriate to the circumstance.

    A simple internet search will yield many sites which offer huge collections of Schulz quotes, Brainyquote.com and Thinkexist.com among them. Dr. Mardy’s newsletter also includes some of his favorites such as:

"I love mankind, it's people I can't stand."

"There is no greater burden than great potential."

"In the Book of Life, The answers aren't in the back."

"It always looks darkest just before it gets totally black."

"It's either the flu or love . . . the symptoms are the same."

"There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker."

"Life is like a ten speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use."

"I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time."

This one from Thinkexist.com:

“I think we can rule out 'mixed brain dominance' as a cause of your poor performance at school, Charlie Brown. Have you ruled out stupidity?"

And not to forget that world famous beagle, Snoopy, WW I flying ace, in his frequent quixotic pursuits of the Red Baron.

    “Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.”

    About Dr. Mardy Grothe:

    He is a psychologist originally trained as an individual therapist and marriage counselor and he has a “longstanding interest in words, language, and quotations. As some people collect coins or stamps or butterflies, he is a passionate quotation collector, with well over 100,000 quotations in his personal collection. In the coming years, he looks forward to producing more books in this area.” (from the biography page of his website drmardy.com)

Six of his books in the “Word and Language Arena” are:

Never Let a Fool Kiss You or a Kiss Fool You:
Chiasmus and a World of Quotations That Mean What They Say and Say What They Mean
(Viking, 1999)

Oxymoronica:
Paradoxical Wit & Wisdom From History's Greatest Wordsmiths
(HarperCollins, 2004)

Viva la Repartee:
Clever Comebacks & Witty Retorts From History's Great Wits & Wordsmiths
(HarperCollins, 2005)

I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like:
A Comprehensive Compilation of History's Greatest Analogies, Metaphors, and Similes
(HarperCollins, 2008)

Ifferisms:
An Anthology of Aphorisms that Begin With the Word "If"
(HarperCollins, 2009)

Neverisms:
A Quotation Lover's Guide to Things You Should Never Do, Never Say, or Never Forget
(HarperCollins, 2011)

    If you enjoy words and the many ways they are used beyond simple communication, you might find a weekly eNewsletter from Dr. Mardy a refreshing break from your routine. I know I do.

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